‘The Real Housewives of New Jersey’ Season 7 Episode 9 Recap: Driving Miss Siggy

Last week’s episode of The Real Housewives of New Jersey focused mainly on Joe Giudice’s looming prison sentence and the toll it was taking on him and his family. The ladies also attended Teresa’s launch party for her book, where an unruly friend of Joe’s caused a scene after being turned away at the door. This week the ladies attend Teresa’s book signing where a couple of unexpected guests show up.

The Real Housewives of New Jersey S7 E9 Recap: Driving Miss Siggy

The episode opens with Siggy talking to her daughter Sophie about the importance of their family’s Jewish traditions. Siggy’s son Joshua returns home after passing his license exam and demands his mother buy him a car. Siggy tells Joshua she’ll buy him a car when she is good and ready to (YES Siggy, you tell him).

Next we see Teresa’s lawyer stop by the Giudice house to prep Joe for his upcoming prison sentence. Their lawyer tells Joe that he needs to be smart about whom he interacts with in jail and that he needs to avoid becoming friends with people like the blowhard that erupted at Teresa’s launch party. Joe agrees and adds that prison will be a good break for his liver as he can’t self-medicate with alcohol while there.

Melissa and Joe’s relationship begins to fracture a bit in this episode as Joe lacks respect for Melissa and her new business. Joe doesn’t want Melissa to have a career of her own because he wants her home to take care of the kids. Melissa’s charming husband tells her “you bring in crumbs and I bring in the cake. I don’t want what you bring in” (so supportive). Joe’s expectations of Melissa are brutish and barbaric, which make his naming his man parts “Tarzan” all the more understandable (*grunts* Me Joe, you Melissa.)

Siggy stops by Melissa’s house to give her marital advice. Siggy empathizes with Melissa’s need for her own success, but advises her to still put in effort for her and Joe through meals and affection. According to Siggy “a marriage is just like a car. If you don’t put gas in it, it’s not going to move” (such wisdom).

The ladies then head to Barnes & Noble for Teresa’s book signing. Unbeknownst to Teresa, Kathy and Rosie are also set to attend. Tre’s cousins arrive and an awkward interaction unfolds as she signs their books. Kathy and Rosie invite Teresa out for lunch, but Teresa says her time is precious and she’d rather spend it with Joe before he goes to prison. Teresa feels betrayed by the remarks her cousins have made about her and no longer wishes to interact with them. The episode ends with Kathy and Rosie’s attempts at reconciling with the Giudices failing as Teresa and Joe leave the book signing. The drama between Teresa and her cousins comes to a head next week as they finally sit down for lunch together. Tune in Sunday at 8pm EST for an all-new episode of The Real Housewives of New Jersey.

Housewives Side Notes:

Teresa:
• Thinks “Texas” is the plural of text.
• Was shocked that her daughters knew she was in prison.
• Told her daughters she was at “work” writing a book about prison.
• Joe thought Brussels sprouts were called “mussel sprouts”.

Melissa:
• Can’t believe she got syrup all over the sink.
• Knows how important sex is in a marriage.

Dolores:
• Not a wine drinker.
• Would rather be sorry she did than be sorry she didn’t.

Jacqueline:
• Can be lifted by Teresa.
• Takes selfies to avoid conflict.

Siggy:
• Her father survived the Holocaust.
• Had a Smurf collection growing up.
• Doesn’t know how to take a step back from (s)mothering Joshua.
• Was her ex-husband’s matchmaker.