Pulitzer Prize-winning author Dave Barry, best known for his beloved humor column in The Miami Herald, recently released his 25th non-fiction book of observational comedy, You Can Date Boys When You’re Forty: Dave Barry on Parenting and Other Topics He Knows Very Little About.

Dave Barry On Fatherhood

Through parenting a now 14-year-old girl, Barry is all too familiar with Justin Bieber – the family-friendly pop star-turned-wannabe bad boy. In fact, Barry attended a Bieber concert in which the “Beauty and the Beat” singer ripped his shirt off for the thousands of adoring young fans. Barry wasn’t impressed.

“At one point he took off, he took off his shirt, which was pretty silly I thought, because he doesn’t have – he’s not Channing Tatum,” Barry told Uinterview exclusively. “You know he, he’s got the same body as the Geico Gecko. But he took his shirt off and, ‘Aah Justin I love you.’ And there’s that.”

While Barry might suggest that Bieber spend more time in the gym to acquire a more manly physique, he thinks that men in general could benefit from trying to recapture the manliness of their ancestors. “I think we use to be more manly. Guys use to be able to fix things, to do things. Now, generally we’ve gotten soft. We don’t even flush our own urinals,” mused Barry. “We think it’s like we’re being manly if we successfully install an app on our phone. We’ve lost the pioneer spirit.

Barry Talks ’50 Shades’

Barry did take the time to read E.L James’ best-selling “mommy porn” novel Fifty Shades of Grey — and was underwhelmed. All that was to be learned from the erotic novel, according to Barry, was something he’d known for decades: being good looking and being rich can make things happen.

“This woman falls in love with a hot billionaire. A twenty-seven-year-old hot, billionaire,” said Barry, recounting the plot of Fifty Shades. “[Anastasia] tells you every three sentences how hot [Christian] is and how billionaire-y he is. But here’s the thing: he wants to tie her up and hit her. … At the end of this book I read all that, and I said to my wife, ‘Do you secretly want me to tie you up and hit you? And she said, ‘No!’ So I learned nothing from that book at all, except that maybe it’s good to be a hot billionaire, but I knew that before I started.”

You Can Date Boys When You’re 40 is currently available for purchase online and in bookstores.