‘Orange Is The New Black’ Season 3 Episode 5 Recap: ‘Fake It Till You Fake It Some More’

Orange Is The New Black‘s “Fake It Till You Fake It Some More” showed the inmates anticipating a new high-paying job, while the guards start to realize the downfalls of Litchfield going private.

Poussey’s Hooch Problem

The episode kicked off with Taystee (Danielle Brooks) and Poussey (Samira Wiley) hanging out in the emptied out library. Taystee, who is jealous that Poussey still gets to work there, is worried that her friend now starts drinking at 8a.m. – or at least she wants to. When Poussey goes to get some from her stash, she realizes that all of her hooch is gone. Leanne (Emma Miles) and Angie (Julie Lake) end up helping Poussey make a new batch. Leanne thinks that a squirrel, who doesn’t move when she starts throwing rocks at it, is the hooch robber and suggests Poussey use pee and cayenne to keep it away – advice that she ends up taking.

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Red & Healy

After Piper (Taylor Schilling) helps Red soften up her look – suggesting less spiky hair, a softer lip and smudging the corner of her eyeliner – Red goes in search of Healy (Michael Harney). She seems to know what she’s doing when she suggestively fixes his shirt in the hallway, however, her flirting goes off the rails when she tells him not to drink too much coffee because of the risk of irritable bowels. Despite her misstep, Healy goes to visit her in the garden later, and opens up about his own history, which may or may not have involved an unappreciated trip to Woodstock. Towards the end of the day, Red and Healy have a drink together in his office. He thinks things are about to get physical between them, but all Red seems to want is the kitchen back. Healy, hurt by getting played, refuses to help her.

The Guards & Caputo

Now that Litchfield is the property of MCC, the guards are worried about the status of their benefits. Their fears prove to be legitimate after they learn that they now have no benefits, and all of their hours have been cut in half. Meanwhile, Caputo is still trying to feel out Pearson (Mike Birbiglia), who tells him that MCC has absorbed the position of warden, which means Caputo is their main man on the ground. Caputo, though happy to hear that, thinks it’s important that everyone meet so that they can all be on the same page. Caputo starts to fear that Pearson and MCC might not know what they’re doing managing a prison, as they’ve introduced a job that pays 10 times the going rate, which will no doubt cause some problems among the women.

The New Job 

The new job is going to pay $1 hour, where most jobs at Litchfield pay just $.10 an hour. No one knows what the new job is going to be, but everyone has their guesses. Daya (Dascha Polanco) thinks it’s going to be a call center, Maritza (Diane Guerrero) thinks it might be picking up trash, but Flaca (Jackie Cruz) believes it has to be something more important, and is determined to try for it. Red (Kate Mulgrew), meanwhile, heard it’s party planning and has no interest. Alex (Laura Prepon) thinks it could be growing genetically modified wheat. Though Big Boo (Lea DeLaria) has no ideas about what it could be, she gives Caputo (Nick Sandow) flowers as a bribe for it.

In order to get the job, the inmates learn that they have to take a test. Flaca is nervous because she’s a bad test-taster. Type-A Piper (Taylor Schilling), who has little doubt that she has the smarts to beat the test, can’t stand the people talking during it – which only makes Alex (Laura Prepon) and Boo more intent on distracting her. Leanne and Angie decide that if only one of them passes the test, neither of them will take the job.

In the end, Cindy (Adrienne C. Moore), Janae (Vicky Jeudy), Piper, and Flaca are among those who get the new job and can’t help but gloat that they’re among the chosen few. But, little do the know, the test was just a bit of theater. The corporation just picked names at random, believing that a test was a way of avoiding any blame for who got the lucrative prison gig. In any case, the very proud and excited group of women are finally led out to the revamped building to start their new jobs. Finally, they learn that their job is for Whispers lingerie, and they’ll be spending their time in a sweatshop sewing panties.

Season 3, Episode 5 Odds & Ends

In Flaca’s flashback it’s revealed that she started selling fake LSD tabs in high school to make money, and the scheme got her sent to jail after a classmate thought he was high on her product and jumped off the high school roof.

Alex thinks a girl she’s just noticing for the first time was sent by Kubra to kill her. Piper teases Alex that it’s actually her who was hired to kill her.

Norma seems to be branching off from Mendoza’s mysticism altogether, and has her own first disciple in a sad Brooke Soso.

After Daya learns from Cesar that Bennett is off the grid, she tells Delia that she can have her baby. (Matt McGory, who plays Bennett, left OITNB mid-season to star on Shonda Rhimes’ How to Get Away with Murder.)

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