‘SNL’s Cold Open Takes Aim At Lori Loughlin And Julian Assange [VIDEO]

In the opening sketch of Saturday Night Live, a number of high-profile criminals including Lori Loughlin and Julian Assange brag about the crimes that got them sent to jail.

Loughlin, played by Kate McKinnon, tells fellow cellmates (played by Chris Redd, Kenan Thompson, and Kyle Mooney) about how she paid $500,000 to get her daughter into USC.

And when her cellmates say she won’t survive in prison, Loughlin counters, “I have been in 68 Hallmark movies, I have seen hell man!”

Michael Avenatti (Pete Davidson) also makes an appearance, bragging to the others about blackmailing Nike and stealing taxes to fund a race car team.

Avenatti even claims this about himself, “And I’m so shady that a porn star once said she had to distance herself from me,” a cheeky reference to Stormy Daniels.

50 CELEBRITIES WHO DIED IN 2018 – TRIBUTE SLIDESHOW

Assange, played by Michael Keaton, assures everyone that he’s the craziest person in the room.

“Yeah, you cheat your schools and you rob your companies, that’s cute, it is, yeah,” he taunts. “I’ve attacked the U.S. military, bitches, cuz I’m an actual James Bond supervillain.”

There was even a brief appearance by Tekashi 6ix9ine, played by Melissa Villaseñor, who bragged about “robbery and gun stuff.”

To see the full video, check below.

Irvin Vita

Recent Posts

VIDEO: Footage Shows Ukraine Striking Command Post Deep In Russian Territory Using Long-Range British Missiles

The Ukrainian Armed Forces said it targeted a Russian military command post on the grounds of a…

2 hours ago

Rachel Maddow Takes $5 Million Pay Cut In New MSNBC Contract As Ratings Plunge – Will Earn ‘Just’ $25 Million A Year

In the days after Donald Trump's victory, MSNBC's ratings dropped by 54%, and since the…

2 hours ago

VIDEO: Firefighters Use Zip Line To Help Dog & Its Owner Across A Swollen River

https://youtu.be/hc4915dr-fk Firefighters in northern Honduras used a zip line to help a dog and its…

4 hours ago

After Living In An RV, Tori Spelling & Her 5 Kids Move Into A $12,000-A-Month Rental

As Spelling's financial statements continue to contradict each other, it is impossible to determine where…

5 hours ago

‘Very Disillusioned’ With America, Ellen DeGeneres & Wife Portia De Rossi Move To England After Trump’s Election

Former talk show host Ellen DeGeneres and her wife, Portia de Rossi, have moved to…

9 hours ago

Madonna Says Producers Want To ‘Downsize’ Her Biopic: ‘We Cannot Make Our Lives Smaller’

Madonna has shared her frustrations over the progress of her biopic after producers told her…

10 hours ago