We’ve got a buffet of stereotypical celeb tweets this week–inevitable self-promotion, a slice of wit, some shameless TMI, and a baaaad pun. But the biggest news of all that had celebs a-buzzin’ was Tiger Woods’ press-conference-slash-apology, to which we award the best tweet of the week to the lovely Alyssa Milano.

BEST

"I got retweeted by @NASA! A Twitter milestone." Elizabeth Banks, Feb. 19

"Today is the birthday of Copernicus. The first man to prove the world does not revolve round Tiger Woods. Happy Birthday Copey." – Craig Ferguson, Feb. 19

"Can some1 explain to me how a man-slut gets the same network coverage as our President or a telethon for #Haiti. Anyone? " – Alyssa Milano, Feb. 19

"And another rumor that I died?? The craziest stuff happens when I get on long plane rides. lol. I’m ALIVE and well and very blessed. Thanks. – Justin Bieber, Feb. 22

"Went to shutter isl. With Chris Rock. Pretty good but I have no idea what the f happened. we both walked out a tiny bit dumber." – David Spade, Feb. 22

WORST

1. "@SambethMoore Just up for a pee, thought I’d say hi. hope your lives are truly great. Really!!! ;^)" – Jim Carrey, Feb. 15

2. "Via @HardcorDougSATX "Jersey Girl Scout Cookies" Starring Bun Affleck & JDough, former co-stars in JELLO." – Kevin Smith, Feb. 17

3. "When ordering off a menu, why do we say "I’ll have THE chicken pomodoro" Why the THE? Why don’t we say "I’ll have chicken pomodoro"? – Adam Lambert, Feb. 22

4. "Oops…almost set fire to the kitchen. Everything is under control now! Phew." Ivanka Trump, Feb 22

5. "I’m worried about Tiger’s balls. They aren’t used to having the same semen in there this long." – Sarah Silverman, Feb. 19

 

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