It’s still courtship time on ABC Monday nights, so let’s run down some highlights from last night’s new Bachelorette.

When it comes to declarations of love on reality shows, there is that eternal conundrum of honesty. If a suitor announces that his feelings are really coming along undeniably, is he speaking the truth or is he just trying to get ahead in the competition?

As Jean, only four weeks in, told Becca, “I’m truly falling for you,” and the foreboding music started to swell, there was hardly any indication that everything was going to work out happily ever after. Becca made it clear that she just wasn’t on that level yet, so when Jean tried to save face with some backtracking, there was no doubt that he was on his way home.

For a more pleasant one-on-one interaction, we can turn to Becca bonding with Blake over their shared love of using boys’ names for baby girls. That’s all well and good for them, but what about the idea I just came up with of naming babies with dog breeds?

But the highlight had to be Becca rocking some plaid as she challenged the boys to chop some wood in “Becca’s Big Lumberjack Bash.” She declared that she was looking for the “lumberjack to my lumberjill,” which is such an elegant turn of phrase that I am shocked to say I don’t remember hearing anyone ever say that before. In a bit of a bad omen of things to come, Jean struggled mightily, despite announcing, “It’s not about the size of the ax, it’s how you swing it.”

In addition to Jean, attorney Nick and former Harlem Globetrotter Christon were shown their way out, while Garrett and Wills both got a pre-ceremony rose for the second time each.

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Jeffrey Malone

Article by Jeffrey Malone

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