Last time on Curb Your Enthusiasm, Larry David became aquatinted of a new woman friend, Bridget. What trials and tribulations await our hero this week?


We join Larry sitting in his office, observing with contempt an affectionate couple outside his window. His verbal challenge to them is cut short, however, when his handyman, Caesar, emerges. Larry offers him a tip, though the Hispanic worker declines it.

Afterwards, Larry’s at Bridget’s house, explaining to her that his friend, Marty Funkhouser, was getting back together with his ex-girlfriend. Larry previously failed to get along with her, reiterating the tasteless tap water she served. Bridget’s son, Eddie, soon arrives. The kid, displeased with how his mother prepared his toast, demanded she redo the whole toast-making process. Larry confides to her that he needs to be disciplined, to which Bridget retorts that she’s been trying to get him into a boarding school that’s an hour and a half away. Larry’s eyes widen when he hears the distance this would create between the two, and he assures Bridget that he’ll do everything within his power to help get Eddie in.

Larry and Bridget are then seated at a nice restaurant, at which point Larry gets a phone call from Caesar who asks if he can watch a television program at Larry’s office. Larry, although reluctant, ultimately agrees to it since he didn’t tip him. Marty and Rhonda arrive shortly thereafter, with Larry doing his part to make amends with Rhonda, who’s appreciative of Larry’s gesture. Marty, thrilled, orders a celebratory bottle of expensive champagne. They head over to the buffet table to collect their food, but a Muslim man attempts to cut the line. The public chastises him, though Larry walks over and defends him. He’s already waited on line, Larry argues, he shouldn’t need to restart the process just to get seconds! Everyone’s moved by Larry’s passion, although our protagonist’s personality begins to grate on Rhonda again when they start eating. Rhonda unfortunately leaves prematurely upon staining her shirt. Marty accompanies her, igniting Larry’s mild frustration at needing to pay for the champagne.

As Larry waits by the restrooms, the Muslim man, who refuses to give his name, approaches Larry, sincerely appreciative for his earlier kindness. However, he admits how he knows Larry, and he initially considered acting out upon the fatwa Larry procured in the first episode of the season. Instead, the Muslim man assures Larry he will try to override the fatwa. Later in the episode, the man does indeed conduct an investigation, wherein he questions several characters from previous seasons, all of whom speak well of Larry’s previous acts.

That night, Larry and Bridget return to her house, where she surprises Larry by saying his off-screen actions were able to get Eddie an appointment to get into the school. She tantalizingly suggests they enjoy “gratitude sex,” stirring Larry’s interest. This is immediately staunched when they walk in, however, as Eddie’s still awake, preventing them from having fun. Bridget then promises Larry that if he can successfully put Eddie to bed, her offer is still open. Larry, with a resolve he’s usually without, marches up into Eddie’s room. Larry barges in, throws Eddie’s guitar on the ground, and explains to the “little prick” how he wants to have sex with his mom and Eddie’s about to go to bed so it can happen.

Back at Larry’s office, Marty arrives to apologize for leaving lunch early the other day. Larry’s unmoved, wanting a “cash apology,” not one “from the heart.” Caesar appears, explaining how although he appreciates how Larry allowed him the use of his television, his wife needed him and he had to leave early. So, could he use Larry’s pool? It’d make Little Caesar happy. Thus, Larry negotiates with Marty to let Caesar use his pool, although Marty cancels later.

Larry’s scheduled meeting at the boarding school starts, and Larry initially does well by successfully pretending he cares for Eddie. The façade breaks down gradually at first, until Larry’s characteristic ranting emerges when he admits he doesn’t know if there will be a long-term future with Bridget. “Well, I can give you nine months,” he unenthusiastically offers. Ultimately, he does say there’s a long-term position awaiting him with her, which is all the school’s two administrators needed to hear. Also, he asks if his handyman and his family can use their pool on Saturday.

Back at the restaurant, Bridget tells Larry that Little Caesar’s accident in the pool was not well received, and they decided against letting Eddie in. She leaves just as Marty and Rhonda arrive, with Larry meekly telling them to enjoy the champagne he ordered. Larry doesn’t catch up to her in time, but an ominous black car pulls up. The familiar Muslim man orders Larry to get in. At the Muslim council, many of Larry’s actions over the series are being deliberated, such as whether or not Larry should have given those teenage girls candy. “He was teaching them a lesson,” Larry’s defendant insists. Ultimately, the council is won over, and they assure Larry the fatwa will be rescinded. Moreover, he can even resume production on his musical, just so long as he adheres to their casting request! The episode ends back at the restaurant, as Larry tries to give the driver a tip.

“Never Wait for Seconds!” is my personal favorite episode of the ninth season of Curb Your Enthusiasm thus far. The cameos of previous characters was tastefully integrated into the fatwa plotline well, and Bridget proves herself as a valuable cast member. However, the single funniest scene was Larry’s curtness when he sent Eddie to bed.

Read more about: