Ahead of releasing his memoir, actor Zachary Levi is opening up about his struggles with depression, his difficult childhood and suffering a “complete mental breakdown” at the age of 37.

Levi, now 41, told journalist Elizabeth Vargas, “I’ve struggled with this stuff most of my life. I didn’t realize that I was struggling with these things until I was 37, about five years ago and I had. complete mental breakdown.”

He said he grew up with a stepfather whose standards were “impossible to reach,” and a mother who had “a borderline personality,” and suffered from heavy mood swings.

Levi also said that no matter how much success he reached in his Hollywood career, “I feel like I’m a bit on the outside looking in. I’ve never really felt like I’m part of whatever the cool kid group is… I think that carried into my career in Hollywood, and it gets reaffirmed to you in the lies you tell yourself when you are not getting certain jobs.”

The actor’s feelings boiled over after he moved to Austin, where he said he was struck with frequent indecision over small issues. “I drove around probably for 10 minutes not knowing which place to eat because I didn’t know which place was the right place to eat as opposed to just saying, ‘Zach, just go eat some food,'” Levi explained.

“I didn’t have a support structure… So, in this particular moment, I’m out here in this wonderful city, but basically by myself, and the darkness surrounds me again.” Levi checked into an emergency that night due to suicidal thoughts, and afterward spent three weeks at a psych ward taking part in what he called “intensive life-changing, life-saving therapy.”

Now, Levi says he manages his anxiety and depression much better, and touts “Prayer and meditation,” as essential for his mental health in his daily routine.

Levi’s memoir is titled Radical Love: Learning To Accept Yourself And Others and will be available starting on June 28.