Conrad Murray, Michael Jackson’s former physician, spoke out about the pop icon’s death on the fifth anniversary of his death, having spent two years behind bars for his part in the tragedy.

Conrad Murray On Michael Jackson's Death

Murray addressed the day of Jackson’s death, the subsequent trial that sent him to prison and his relationship with Jackson and his children in his interview with CNN’s Don Lemon. Though Murray in no way sees himself as a murderer, he says he’s remorseful for how Jackson’s death came to pass on June 25, 2009.

“It was just monumental grief, an unexpected, surreal situation. I cannot believe the changes that happened within a couple of hours,” said Murray, who was the last person to see Michael Jackson alive. “It was just impossible. It was just unfathomable.

Murray added that he was just as stunned to realize that he was the one fingered for Jackson’s death, saying, “I could not believe that, just hours ago, I was trying to muster all the strength I can to save the life of a friend and a patient, and here I am, on to the spotlight, all focus, fingers pointing as though I'm the one to blame.

What Killed Michael Jackson?

At the time of Jackson’s death, Murray was giving him medication to help him sleep – namely lorazepam and midazolam. Murray does not belive that the dosage was harmful to Jackson and was thankful that he’d weaned him off taking Propofol to sleep.

“I do not think Michael Jackson would die from four milligrams of lorazepam or four milligrams of midazolam,” said Murray. “Certainly, I was divided and I was very cautious as far as giving Michael Jackson that type of medication to sleep. As you know, before that time, Michael Jackson was on Propofol. And I had weaned him successfully off of Propofol up to three days prior to his death.”

Murray believes that Jackson’s death was a result of his ongoing addiction to demoral, which he claims had been fed to him by Dr. Arnold Klein. During the moments leading up to Jackson’s deteriorating state, Murray had not been at his side. At that time, Murray believes he self-administered drugs that led to his own demise.

“Whatever happened to Michael when I was not there is probably his own misjudgment,” said Murray. “ And I believe that that clearly happened because he was illogical, he was irrational, and he was in the withdrawal state from Demerol that Dr. Klein was feeding him.”

Murray stopped short of taking responsibility for Jackson’s death, instead speaking of remorse and his friendship with the singer. “You know, I am very remorseful that Michael has passed away,” Murray told Lemon, who noted people found him aloof after Jackson’s passing. “Michael was a friend. And he touched me in so many ways, that I felt like a father figure to Michael, though I wasn't old enough to be his dad. I felt as though I was protecting Michael all the time. I did.”