In her first public interview on since her divorce from Bill Gates was announced, Melinda French Gates told CBS Mornings about her experience before, during and after making the decision to split up, concerns she had about Bill’s relationship with financier and sex criminal Jeffrey Epstein, and what the dynamics of their relationship are like now.

While Melinda alluded to “many things,” that contributed to their marriage dissolving over time, aspects highlighted in the interview were a degradation of trust she had in him after Bill had an affair in 2000 with a Microsoft employee and the fact that he was friends with Epstein.

She said that she asked to meet Epstein one time and “regretted it from the second I stepped in the door. He was abhorrent. He was evil personified. I had nightmares about it afterward.” Melinda told Gayle King she made it “very clear” how she felt about the late Epstein, but suggested that Bill continued to meet with him anyway.

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In the wake of their divorce, Melinda said, “I don’t question myself now, not at all. I gave every single piece of myself to this marriage.” Despite having this confidence, Gates still admitted that “I had a lot of tears for many days. I mean, days where I’m literally laying on the floor and the carpet’s this close to me.”

Even though she went through a lot of grief and anger, she concluded that finally, “It’s 2022 and I’m actually really about what’s to come and life ahead for me.” When asked about her relationship with Bill now, she said, “We certainly have a working relationship,” which makes sense given she is still co-chair with Bill of the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundatiohn. She hesitantly called them, “friendly at this point,” but said there is still “healing that needs to happen” before they could be considered friends.

Gates has also been working on a new company, Pivotal Ventures in Seattle, the beautiful office of which also served as the location for the CBS interview. The company is an incubator designed to invest in projects that empower women in many different sectors including tech, politics and mental health.

You can watch the full interview below:

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