Jennifer Hudson Opens Up About Family Murders

It’s been about a year and a half since Jennifer Hudson‘s mother, brother and young nephew were slain in her hometown of Chicago. For the first time since the murders, Hudson is addressing the tragedy. “It’s all a blur, it was surreal,” she told VH1’s Behind the Music. “It was like I was outside of myself.”

Hudson’s family members were found dead with multiple gunshot wounds. “I prayed when I’d get up in the morning and prayed before I laid down at night," she said. "If I didn’t I’d wake up depressed… the day wouldn’t go right.” The R&B singer/actress has always often referenced her family especially post-tragedy. In her 2009 acceptance speech for her Grammy award win, Hudson thanked "my family in heaven, and those who are here today."

The 28-year-old said the unexpected murders sent her into deep seclusion, and she rejected a film role for it. “For almost two weeks straight… [I was] inside one room with just family and friends coming in and out,” Hudson said. "I was like, I have to get adjusted to who I am. I can’t be another character if I don’t even know who I am … I feel like I’ve lived about three or four different lives." Hudson’s last feature roles were in the 2008 movies The Secret Life of Bees and Sex and the City.

Now, Hudson is a mother to her 11-month-old son David and is engaged to WWE wrestler David Otunga. She said her baby has helped her through the process of moving on, noting that he reminds her of her nephew and mother. "In so many ways I channel her because she was such a great mom," she said. "[My son] makes me feel like the most special person on earth. I want him to get the same love and the same upbringing my mother gave us." – Natthakan Garunrangseewong

For more on Jennifer, go to our partner BlackVoices.com.