Here Comes Honey Boo Boo premiered on Wednesday night with matriarch Mama June Shannon confiscating her daughter’s cell phones since she’s sick of all the time they spend texting on them. Technology-free and left to their own devices, Alana “Honey Boo Boo” Thompson and her nearly as outrageous siblings set to making themselves an indoor Slip ‘N Slide. How do they go about it? They clothe themselves in garbage bags and lather each other’s bags with butter and oil and away they went.

Needless to say, the girls make a massive mess and piss off Mama June. It wasn’t all for not, however, since as soon as they were able to lift them selves off the fat-slicked floor they got their phones back.

Next on the agenda for the Shannon-Thompson clan is a rip to a local wrestling match where they’ll get the added perk of backstage access. After Sugar Bear nearly wrecks their time with the wrestlers after letting one rip, Alana and company get some wrestling tips they're sure to try out on each other at the earliest opportunity.

Back at the house, it’s time for dinner, and roadkill seems to be the delicacy of choice. While Alana names off her roadkill wish list, which is quite extensive, Mama June decides on pig and cooks up pork and beans, much to Sugar Bear’s delight. Sugar Bear might not be quite as pleased, however, with what the girls have planned for his 41st birthday.

All Sugar Bear wants for his birthday is to spend time with his girls, but they want to throw him a Dukes of Hazard-themed bash. Not only do they get him a Daisy Duke jean shorts shaped piñata, they take him to the local go kart track to race cars. Mama June is hesitant to participate, but ultimately joins in on the fun. At the end of the day, June is fairly happy with how Sugar Bear’s birthday went – Sugar Bear not so much. He wants some alone time with Mama June.

Although June says she’d be turned on by a new crockpot, Sugar Bear woos her with a bouquet of carnations and some ho-ho feeding in the bed. The end of the episode ends with Sugar Bear cooing to Mama June “I need some quality alone time. Just cuddling and laying.”

Here Comes Honey Boo Boo airs Wednesdays on TLC at 9/8c.

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