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CERN Large Hadron Collider Hasn’t Found Portals To Other Dimensions, Despite Conspiracy Theories

The CERN Hadron collider located near Geneva, Switzerland has resumed atom-smashing in their Large Hadron Collider after three years of maintenance. While there have already reportedly been interesting discoveries of new “exotic particles,” some online conspiracy theorists took it a little far and made ludicrous claims that the physics lab was trying to open an extra-dimensional portal.

Some users said the fact that CERN was beginning to restart the LHC around the same time as the recent planetary alignment indicated that a portal would open, though that is obviously a flimsy connection.

Unfortunately, any Buffy The Vampire Slayer fans thinking a Hellmouth will actually come to Switzerland is sorely mistaken. They still had an impressive and exciting first day working the LHC on July 5. They said “the LHC is now set to run for close to four years at the record energy of 13.6 trillion electronvolts (TeV), providing greater precision and discovery potential.”

This increased power led to discoveries of three new particles in its short period of operation. These new “exotic hadrons” could help the lab better understand how the composite particles, known as “quarks” bind together in groups of up to five-quark hadrons.

A five-quark hadron, known as a “pentaquark” was discovered, and what they discovered as the “first-ever pair of ‘tetraquarks,'” or four-quark hadrons.

As interesting as these discoveries, they’re a far cry from the tales that people were spinning on Twitter or their YouTube and TikTok accounts. Definitely keep listening to the scientists on this one, even if hearing about new particles isn’t as gripping as dimensional portals.

Jacob Linden

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