Hours before the news of the suicide of her boyfriend, Anthony Bourdain, broke out, Asia Argento posted a strong message on her Instagram.

In a now-deleted Instagram story, Argento posted a photo of her wearing a shirt that said “F–K EVERYONE.” with an in-photo caption: “you know who you are.” The meaning of her story is still unclear.

After the news broke out, she deleted the post and later posted her own statement on Twitter. She wrote, “Anthony gave all of himself in everything that he did. His brilliant, fearless spirit touched and inspired so many, and his generosity knew no bounds. He was my love, my rock, my protector. I am beyond devastated. My thoughts are with his family. I would ask that you respect their privacy and mine.”

Following his death, there was much speculation that the two were having relationship troubles, which is what led to his suicide, causing people to blame Argento for not helping him in his time of need. Fellow Harvey Weinstein victim and #MeToo advocate Rose McGowan published an open letter to The Hollywood Reporter on Argento’s behalf.

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“Sitting across from me is the remarkable human and brave survivor, Asia Argento, who has been through more than most could stand, and yet stand she does,” McGowan wrote. “She stood up to her monster rapist and now she has to stand up to yet another monster, suicide. The suicide of her beloved lover and ally, Anthony Bourdain … Many of these people who lost their ‘friend’ are wanting to lash out and blame. You must not sink to that level. Suicide is a horrible choice, but it is that person’s choice.”

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She then went on to explain that Bourdain did try to seek help, but did not listen to professionals. McGowan pleaded for no one to put “misplaced blame” on Argento. “Anthony’s internal war was his war, but now she’s been left on the battlefield to take the bullets. It is in no way fair or acceptable to blame her or anyone else, not even Anthony.”

McGowan concluded her open letter by saying, “To the media and to the random commenter, Anthony would never have wanted Asia to be hurt, I’d like to think he would want us to have the collective conversation that needs to be had about depression. Blame is NOT a conversation, it is the shutting down of our collective growth. Which is where we are now. We have a choice as humans, shrink to our smaller, uglier selves, or be better and grow as only true Phoenixes can. I urge you to be that Phoenix.”